[Baren lost Tanuki-san and it's one of those rare moments where he's actually not happy about that. It's about to get dark soon and if he doesn't find him in time, he might deal with yet another experience of having to run around in the fog without efficient transportation.

So that's why he's standing in front of a haunted house.

There's a brief look around - maybe he misjudged and Tanuki was actually somewhere else - but instead he spots—]

If it isn't my favorite meathead - Z, we're going in here.

[NO CHOICE.]

[what]

No. [i mean, he's stopping anyway but] Go inside yourself. [and, you know. walking over himself.] Why the hell do you wanna waste your time in one of those anyway?

Tanuki lost me.

["I lost Tanuki."

And he doesn't really waste time otherwise, moving behind Zoro and lifting up his foot to just

kick him inside.]

[WHARBL there he goes

he faceplants down the entryhall and gets real acquainted with the ratty, moth-eaten carpet runner there.]

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR ASSHOLE?! WHO SAID I WAS GOING TO HELP?!

No one, but I thought it! You're not good for much but a haunted house alone sounds pathetic.

[TERRIBLE.

Baren brushes aside the fake cobwebs as he strolls inside like he's headed to a picnic and unties the bells from his hair.

And ties them around one of Zoro's back belt loops.

It'll make him easier for the """monsters""" to find but also Baren won't lose him this way, so.]

Hey. [nope. baren's not stopping. still tying that bell on him.] Hey.

[anime forehead veins are popping.] What're trying to do, huh? Don't make me your pet just because your old one ran away from you.

I already have too many pets.

[somewhere in the city, chuuya sneezes

but regardless baren's grinning, shrugging as he starts to walk?? backwards into the haunted house? this sounds like a terrible idea - ]

Let's go, let's go! Sloooowpoke.

Where are we–[the bell on his belt loop jingles as he scrambles to stand up.]

YOU KEPT IT ON?! I THOUGHT YOU TOOK IT OFF!! GET BACK HERE!

[now he's less scrambling to stand and more scrambling to catch up with baren so he can wring his neck]

BAREN!

[zoro plunders into him. it? pronoun it not stephen king's it? hopefully the chainsaw isn't real because if it is this just went full gorefest

also? the bell? still jingling cutely]

[THE CHAINSAW ISN'T REAL AND ZORO'S A MADMAN. The clown is getting bowled over because this is just a guy trying to make a buck on the weekend and Zoro should feel bad.

Baren's cackling at this point and ducking down a left turn at a fork.

That said his knowledge of haunted houses is limited and he manages to trip a wire that shuts the pathway behind him.

He wanted to get away but - ]

Motherfucker...!

[HOW DOES HE FIND Z]

[easily. because zoro doesn't stop for some paltry trick... wall?? whatever. like a true bull in a china shop, zoro just

charges through it.

doesn't even have a scratch on him thanks shonen powers.]

TAKE THIS DAMN THING OFF ME!!

[baren just barely manages to sidestep after zoro DESTROYS PROPERTY and he's

still cracking up? he's still cracking up. he clutches his stomach after ended up surprised into cackling and he places one hand on the wall]

But I - oh shit!

[this maze is awful and he's falling through the wall

see you later]

[this. this, of all things, is what stops him.

baren might be able to see through these traps but sometimes they get a little hazy for zoro. he watches as the wall gobbles baren up and stops short. touches the wall. it doesn't move. his anger quickly changes into a light panic.]

Hey... Hey! Hey! Baren! Baren! [is he gone? what happened? how does he make the wall give him back???

it's zoro so he starts kicking it.] Hey! Out of my way, shitty wall!

[he can start kicking it. it might even rattle a little bit but just a little bit.

baren is on the other side, nursing his ego more than any injury as he listens to zoro and

contemplates

then - ]

OooooOOOOoooo - Z! Avenge meeeee!

[bam. now he's dead.]

[WHOA]

–A ghost? [hm. do dead people become ghosts that quickly? zoro's skeptical. either way...]

Like hell I will! Get back to life, bastard! I have to pick up Kyouko!

- oh shit, really?

[yeah he's much better behaved for kyouko than zoro. baren makes a little musing noise at that and then glances back at the hallway he's in. time to find a way out then.]

Maybe...

[and he'll walk a few steps, his hands grazing along the walls and

he accidentally flips a switch that triggers a sound effect of a blood curdling scream that makes him cover his ears.

oops. no not that.]

[ok. a bit more worrying. zoro's back at the wall.]

Baren?! I'll kick your ass if that was you!

[POUNDING... ON THE DOOR... WILL THE DOOR LAST??]

[baren glances back at the door and just stares]

... what does he think I sound like....

[coinflip says the door lasts. the coinflip hates zoro a lot.]

Find a way around, Z!

[he has the bells so like maybe they won't end up too far from each other]

What do you mean find a way around?! You're a ghost, aren't you?! Ghost through the damn wall!

[ . . . ]

Ah... It worked too well....

[Baren takes another step, though his voice sounds like it should be getting further away.

It triggers a strobe light where Zoro is.

Sorry bro.]

[the strobe light is what makes him shout the most. he punches it out. but then??? lightbulbs are hot?????

baren can definitely hear zoro cursing about his hot hand.]

[zoro shouts and immediately

backwards bodyslams whatever's on his back into the wall behind him.

who knows, alright? maybe it's an evil wall trying to eat him.]

[is the prank worth it

is it

probably not because baren's making a pained noise up until that wall also gives way and

instead of just a different hallway it's a slide that leads them tumbling down a floor]

You idiot...!!

[they don't even need zoro's poor sense of direction to fuck them up here]