[is that a fucking pun]

definite no or no deal.

[and he will drive to wherever that address is. and not stop the car. just rev the (actually impressive) engine so that baren knows he's there.

anyone around baren will think he's an ass.

good.]

[correct on all accounts.

and he's baren, snorting as he wanders over. for the record, his outfit of the day is ludicrous and luxurious and comfy as fuck - and more importantly, needs to be highlight because this is the guy who's giving zoro fashion advice. however baren has an eccentric enough look that he can wear just about anything. not sure if the same could be said for his friend

he slides in the passenger's seat and doesn't buckle up]

Let's do the Towers. I can at least get you some discounts...

What the hell do your shorts say?

[yes, he has yet to move the car because he has been trying to parse the words. they're bright and eye-catching. he must know.]

Oveinin?

[God. Stupid. Whatever. he doesn't care anymore. he sets the car in drive and takes them down a route less traveled. aka a slightly more illegal one through tight alleys and away from traffic.]

You never told me how you found that video.

I borrow other people's phones, you know this.

[which means he gets access to a wide, wide, wiiiide scope of information. that also means access to gay twitter.]

You're a gay icon. Congrats. You versus the Babadook, who'd win in a fight? I should start taking bets.

What does the Babadook have to do with it?

[he shifts into gear and whisks around another corner.]

I'd win.

[just saying. oh look, those are the Towers coming up.]

Not sure how I feel being on someone else's phone.

[baren reaches up for something to hold onto just bc the only time he doesn't trust zoro's driving to be smooth is when it's time to fight for parking

anyway]

Memes.

[to answer the babadook question]

Welcome to my life. Maybe you'll be recognized along with me today.

[PARKING'S FIIIINE. he steals a spot from a bmw and parallel parks at breakneck speed with perfect precision. it's terrifying.]

I don't want to be recognized for that.

[lil shove at baren's leg.] Let's get this over with, Oveinin.

[it sure is terrifying and baren is rubbing at his neck from the result of it

and also not hesitating to shift in the seat enough that he can lift his leg high enough to kick zoro before exiting the car]

Don't sound like that, this'll be fun, Malibu Ken! Maybe you'll upgrade to Gay Bar Ken.

[he swats at the kick while getting out himself. locks it up manually because this volvo is retro as fuq.]

What do I have to do to make sure you never say those words again.

[it's rhetorical. he thinks. he truly doesn't want to hear that shit again.]

Go with me to an actual gay bar.

[he's answering it even though it's rhetorical]

You'd be a hit. Meet your adoring fans.

[at least once they're at the Towers themselves, Baren takes the lead. he also puts on sunglasses while a the same time doing nothing to hide his signature feathers and hair bells

the duality of man]

[there's their next thread.]

I don't care about fans.

[just reminds him of that weird rooster he saw. and baren's obnoxious following. already he thinks he sees someone taking a picture. he speeds up to walk beside baren.]

Those bells make you sound like a cat.

Meow!

[shameless.

and baren shrugs even as he wanders into one store, raises a hand in greeting to one of the sales people before pressing one finger to his own lips. he will probably repeat this gesture in every store they go in]

Clearly not. Especially not for my fans. You gave that one kid a really hard time. It was kinda funny.

[dON'T NYA

zoro rolls his eyes since he was too late to cover baren's shameful mouth.]

You saw that? [he'll let baren wander in and putz around towards the front, picking and prodding at the upscale clothes like a plebian.] He was pathetic. It was annoying.